My Love Story
One True Love
Married 11 years. This is my one and only
love. He proposed to me on a playground. This
was the man who taught me the meaning of love.
We were a part of what God truly meant to be
as husband and wife. My best friend, an aura
of comfort as I held him in my arms. Every physical
and spiritual fulfillment in a man I ever wanted.
Not once did I want anyone else. No one could
take his place.
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We were to renew our vows. I practiced for
months, my new vows-I would repeat them in the
car, or in the grocery store silently. I could
not wait to begin our next years with good histories,
and good hearts. To show him in renewed vows
how over many years, ups and downs, I held solid
in my devotion.
And then promises were broken.
At first I focused mainly on how I couldn't
even breathe without him. A pattern of hurtful
words, plans never made and even an affair.
I endured pulling him back from someone else's
arms, his eyes so sincere with lies, his words
so very melodical and spellbinding. I listened
believing every word he said. I crushed every
time he entered a room. I could not see or believe
what was going on. No Christmas presents, no
birthday presents, no anniversary plans carried
through, talking to me like I was a stranger,
a list too long to share.
I often asked myself, 'What did I do?' or 'Why
did he do this?' It took a while for me to figure
this out. He had changed. I did not change.
My love was still strong. I could battle all
external things, but not the man himself.
His last promise he made was that he was going
to come back to me and we would live together
always, never to be apart, grow old together.
He told me he cried when he thought of what
a mistake it was he said by telling me goodbye
two days after Christmas. Then just weeks ago
he tells me that his job has become more important
and he knows I have a job that I finally have
after years of looking. When a man picks a job
over his wife...well it's time to leave. But
that's not the worst promise broken.
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The one thing I asked him not to break was
that I asked him not to put me through any more
pain. This was my final outcome.
I took the final step and decided to walk away.
I am ready now. He has lost the one thing he
should have never let go of. I think I deserve
better. I am the one who has no guilt, or remorse.
And it takes my own strength to break the chains
I put on myself by loving a man and forgetting
to respect myself.
There is strength in the power of goodbye,
it all begins with courage.
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