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Chris Diary Part 3
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Chris Diary
Part
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2 | Part 3
Four years ago, the doctor said I had cancer, but it was
found early, so it was still curable. Thinking
that it was okay, I started living my normal
life again, and even forgot about the cancer.
I didn't think about the cancer again and did
not go back to the doctor. Until a month ago,
my stomach was hurting for two weeks straight,
and the nightmare awakened me again. First I
thought the pain wouldl go away, but it grew
stronger until to the point that I couldn't
take it anymore. I went back to the doctor and
took an X-ray. The picture came out and there
was a big black spot, which proved the truth
that I did not want to believe. I was at the
most glittering part of my life, but it was
coming to an end. I wanted myself and the people
around me to go through the least pain possible,
so I decided to commit suicide.
But I couldn't let people find out about my
intentions, especially Susan, the person I love
the most in this whole world, who still doesn't
know about the truth. Susan was still young,
she shouldn't have to go through this. So I
made up some stories and lied to her. It was
a cruel thing to do, and it broke her heart,
but it was the fastest way to wipe out three
years's feelings. I didn't have much time, because
I would soon start to loose hair and she would
find out eventually. But now I'm close to succeeding,
this drama would soon be over. Thirty minutes
more this would all come to an end, that was
what I had in mind.
The train had stopped running so I called a
taxi for her. We were just standing there, waiting,
loosing our last moments in silence.
I saw the taxi from far away, I held my tears
and said to her, "Take care of yourself,
take good care of yourself."
She didn't talk, just nodded lightly, and then
opened up her misshaped umbrella and stepped
out on the street. Out in the rain, we became
two single life forms, one red, one black, so
far away from each other. I opened the door
for her and she got in, then I close the gate
that would separate me from her forever. I stood
by the car, staring in the dark window, at the
first love in my life, also the last one, walking
out of my life. The car started, driving into
the street. Finally I couldn't hold my sorrow
and the twist in my heart any longer, waving
my arms rapidly chasing after the taxi, because
I knew, this would be the last time I see her.
I wanted to tell her I still love her, I wanted
to tell her to stay, I wanted to tell her so
much, but the taxi had already turned in the
corner. Warm tears kept falling down my face,
blended with the cold rain drops. I was cold,
not because of the rain. I was cold inside.
She left, and I didn't get anymore of her phone
calls even until today. I know she didn't see
my tears, because they were washed away by the
rain. I left without regrets. But I'm not Chris,
I'm that girl Susan, using my memory, and his
diary I found after one year since he left,
writing down these last words.
Chris Diary Part
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2 | Part 3
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